it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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