I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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