Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
