I can tuck mytits in my pants
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize