so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
