I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Barsexuality is the new black.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
