VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
He? As in you personified your dick?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize
