Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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