She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
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Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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