Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
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"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Help. Why am I so naked?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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