the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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