I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
