just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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