I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Actions speak louder than pants.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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