so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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