I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
