This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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