Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
