I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Randomize
