i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
