He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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