no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
