Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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