Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
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I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
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google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
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