This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
