just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
