ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
