i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
