You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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