Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
