i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
These tits shall not be calmed
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
