He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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