How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
