i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
