When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
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