hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
