I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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