Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
