i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
It's never too late to be topless.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
