Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
