Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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