are you so shy because you have an std?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Four minutes until I can fart!
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
