Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
