saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize