she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Someone shattered a urinal.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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