Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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