I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
