Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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