The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
