It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize